Down Under: Franz Josef: The Madness Continues

February 2014

After an awesome weekend in Queenstown I returned Franz Josef refreshed and ready to take on the rest of the summer. Well I say refreshed I was a mess and I had work that night which was painful but after a sleep I felt a lot better. It was a well needed break!

The weather was in full summer swing now along with the tourist season. I remember when I first got to Franz Josef and a big night was when you had 4 buses in. It was now at least 6 daily peaking at 9/10 on occasion. Thankfully they didn't all have 50+ people on them but it certainly was a lot mouths to pour shots in to. Now almost every night was flat out from start to finish.

Sun is out!

Oscar called an emergency meeting one afternoon which was unusual. He even came around to our house to make sure we would all make it. We were all panicking! I was racking my brain trying to think of what I might have done wrong, if there was a door I hadn't locked the night before or if the police might shut us down for some reason.

"Come with me, I have a surprise for you." This was most unexpected. Apparently in January we had checked in over 10,000 guests for the month, the most the Rainforest Retreat has ever done in a single month so all the staff had a treat and this was ours. We all got into the kayak van and he drove us around to the Glacier Guides. Sweet, I thought, he's treating us to a glacier walk which would be awesome. But then he walked next door to the skydive office!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Sarah is thrilled, James was buzzing, Gavin and Tony are super scarred but excited and I'm still stood outside the office with my hands on my head with a look of sheer terror on my face saying NO NO NO!

I always said I would rather do a skydive and a bungy and having done a bungy this should be no problem. But I had time to prepare for the bungy, I knew it was coming, I was able to prepare myself. This was just thrown on me when I least expected it. I think I said at the time that I would have rather have been in trouble! I wasn't just the horror of throwing myself out of a plane, I had concerns about my ears because I have so much trouble on planes and I cannot equalise.

Going skydiving!

After I was assured my ears would be ok I signed my name on the piece of paper and assured Oscar that if anything does go wrong then he would be solely responsible! I hated Oscar at this point. I knew after I would probably thank him but at that moment I hated him!

We drive round to the skydive place, got kitted up and before I know it we are all crammed onto this extremely small plane and the whole time I'm just trying to keep my head and not hyperventilate! I'm watching one of the skydivers altitude watches go up really slowly whilst the ground already looks so far away. Shitting bricks would be the biggest understatement in the world.

The door opens, Gavin disappears out of it, I'm on the ledge desperately trying to remember what I was told to do, a grip on to the harness so tightly and suddenly there's silence and the plane is shrinking away from me!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

OH MY GOD!!! It was the most ridiculous moment of my life! My instructor tells me to open my hands and I'm flying! Screaming, A LOT! Half laughing at the same time. I'm still falling, still screaming, still laughing. I'm trying to look around at the sea, the mountains, the glacier, the valleys. ITS INSANE!

The parachute opens and now I notice its my ears that are screaming but I'm still laughing. We float all the way down and land in the field next to the runway. I sit on the ground laughing to myself. Why am I still laughing? I walk over to where Tony and James are waiting for their turn to jump and they ask me how it was and I just laugh, I cant stop laughing! I think I've cracked!

I had just about recovered to see Tony and James do their jumps and I can here Tony from the ground shouting "OH MY GOD!!!" in his loud Canadian voice!

The best thing I have ever done! SO SO GOOD! That whole night I was buzzing even though I was working and even the next day when I was telling people about it the buzz would come back. I did thank Oscar in the end. The only way I was going to do it was if some one made me and he did. And I'm so glad I did!

Me and Hayley at the start of our mission

With such nice weather I thought it was a good idea to Alex Knob again. This time with Hayley because she had never done it. She warned me after we had started that she had a dodgy knee which might pop out of place at any point and I would have to shove it back in for her and then carry her down the mountain. Not what I'd signed up for! Luckily everything held together and we made it to the top.

Looking stumped!

Dramatic looking

Glacier thing

It was a really good day all round but the absolute highlight was the jelly baby incident. The funniest thing ever! Its probably one of those be there moments but when Hayley destroyed a pack of jelly babies by ripping the entire bag in half, showering the ground in jelly babies and receiving odd looks for 2 people near by, it was absolutely hilarious. It was like it was on replay over and over in my head and we couldn't stop laughing. I'm still laughing at it now!

Jelly Baby disaster

We made it to the top with an other incident occurring, had a bit of a picnic and trundled back down. It was a very good day to be up there and great views yet again.

Hayley made it

Mountains!

Great day!

Now to tell the story about the most horrendous thing I have ever done in my life! There was this guy, John, who was staying with us for a month. He's in a wheelchair as he has limited mobility. One of those super high tech wheelchairs with all the gadgets like it rises up so that he can sit at the bar.

One of these days he is sat at the bar having a drink quite happily. Julz on the other hand had done something which prompted me to get the postmix gun and squirt her with a bit of water, as you do. I missed. I accidental got John who fell out of his chair on to the floor! The place stopped and the world imploded. Well not quite but it felt like it! Nobody really knew what to do until James ran over to pick him up!

His response once he was back in his chair and could type on his Ipad "what the fuck happened?" and everyone just laughed. I felt a little relieved but that was the most horrible situation. I felt so bad! Everyone said I'll be going to hell! But John was absolutely fine with it and that's the thing about him. He's always so happy and joking despite his problems. He's actually got a book about when he went travelling across America in his wheelchair. He was down at the skydive site everyday to skydive everyday! He really is a rare legend that I'm so glad to have met. Perhaps I shouldn't have made him jump out of his chair though!

Darren and Tara in the normal clothes

Tony in his normal clothes

Me being perfectly normal!

As part of the treat for the 10,000 guests we had had in January, Oscar had organised a staff kayak trip which I was allowed to join in despite having already had a treat. I was the only bar staff on the trip with a few hosts, receptionists, housekeepers and Tash from the kitchen who was paired up with me.

Pull at attractive face!

Miesha and Jon

I was steering which Tash found very odd as she is an experienced canoeist and knows what shes doing. She didn't shout at me at all though even when I got us stuck on a log!

Wedged

Gather!

Lovely stuff

I threw mine the highest!

Rebel

It was another good kayak trip but the fun didn't stop there. There was a staff party in the bar that night and as I missed out on really enjoying the Christmas party I was really happy to see that I had the night off and I could go and drink with the rest of them.