Sunday, 14 July 2013

Farming in Bundaberg

21st March - 23rd June 2013

It was time to do my farm work in order to get my visa so I could spend another year in Australia once my current visa expired. A quick flight from Melbourne to Brisbane and a long 8 hour bus journey and I arrived in Bundaberg to work on an organic veg farm. When I arrived in Bundaberg it was a town on its knees a little bit. Extensive flooding in January meant that they were still picking up the pieces when I arrived. There were houses on there side and upturned boats along the riverbank but as the dry season approached they were able gradually remove these and repair the buildings that were damaged and make it stop looking like such a war zone.

Day 1: so clean
Farmwork was the most physically demanding and therefore mentally demanding job I've ever had. It didn't help that I hadn't been to the gym in 6 months and had basically sat on my arse in Adelaide for 2 months. The first couple of weeks were agony on the back as almost every job on the farm required you to be bent over and on top of that the heat at the end of summer was torturous at times. There were a few days in that first few weeks where I thought that I wouldn't be able to stick it out, either I'd end up quitting or be fired. I was determined to give it my all though and I really did have to give it everything for the first month until my fitness increased and the heat decreased.

I called him Marvin
There was a variety of jobs so it wasn't always mind numbing. It wasn't just picking the vegetables, it was planting them, weeding them, pruning them, chipping them and tying some of them up. They had pumpkin, capsicum, tomatoes, chilli, endless amounts of potatoes and bastard zuchini. The worst of all these and the serious bane of my life were the eggplant! The leaves have a powder on them that when the leaves are dry they give you the worst hayfever-type reaction ever! I don't suffer from hayfever and I'm so glad I don't because it was horrible. Every time I did it I finished a sneezing, dribbling mess of a human being. Thankfully I only did it about 5 times towards the end but I will happily never do it again in my life.

EVIL EVIL EGGPLANT!
The work itself wasn't all that bad after a while, you got used to it and as long as I was earning some decent cash then it was good. Sometimes I even enjoyed it believe it or not. A hard days graft earning some money with a chilled beer at the end was very good indeed. The problem was that sometimes you weren't always earning that much. Picking potatoes was when you probably earned the least amount of money at $1 a crate. It was a group contract meaning that no matter how fast you went you would have to share the total amount with everyone and inevitably lose money. If you were the slowest then everyone pretty much hated you. One particular Swedish dude springs to mind. Everyone understands that when you are new you will be slow, I was when I started but this guy started the same day as me and never got quicker. I became one of the fastest at picking potatoes and he was always the slowest. Even the new people would be beating him on their first days. To make matters worse he was extremely antisocial and just generally weird AND I had to share a room with him. I had a go at him a couple of times for losing the team money. Our supervisor didn't like him, the owners son and his wife didn't like him so why he never got fired I'll never know. Anyway rant over! (he's the one in the first picture, far left. Hate him, hate his face!). (I also hate that he's made such a feature is blog! ARGH!)

grafting hard!
The weather strangely played a part in how much money you would earn in a day. Obviously if its raining then some jobs aren't do-able but as we moved into winter and the mornings became cold (and I mean bloody cold) then things didn't grow as quickly. The most obvious example would be the zuchini where you would pick 2-3 buckets per row everyday to the point where you would be lucky to fill a bucket every other day.

Ron watering the zuchinis
The owner of the farm was a man called Russel and his wife Mariann. There son Nathan ran the farm along with his wife Andrea who was in charge of the backpackers and then there was our supervisor, Jules, a French backpacker who met his wife-to-be in Bundaberg and stayed with sponsorship 3 years ago. There was also a few other workers that got to drive round in tractors all day while we did all the work. There was a 60 year old woman who would do some of the hard jobs with us and she was pretty quick despite her age so if you were feeling a bit tired you just needed to look at her and you realise you shouldn't be complaining. If she could do it then so could I.

Colin
There were some animals on the farm which were mainly for the families own use. I named a few of them on the odd occasion when I was bored. There were the cows: Marvin (he kept sneaking out and eating the potatoes), Marvin Junior (he looked like Marvin just smaller), Big Dave (the only bull of the group with enormous testicles!) and Betty (she was the only white one). There were pigs one of which I named Nigel and a sheep called Pickles. I'm not mad a swear. There were also two dogs Colin and Jess.

Pigs!
They have neuter the pigs themselves which produces better meat. By neuter I mean they hold it down and chop its balls off! Supposedly humane but the sound of the pig squealing was chilling and I couldn't help but cross my legs! Especially when Russel told me I'm next!

They also killed a couple of cows so they could have steak at a party they were planning and we were invited to watch. Being a big meat eater I felt like it should be something I should witness and went along with them. I thought I would react more when the cow was shot in the head but I suppose its a pretty normal thing to happen. The worst part though was when they were skinning it and they had to chop its head off. They had to cut through everything and then twist it. All the bones in its neck were cracking and its the only time I had to look away coz it was disgusting!

Pickles
So work was hard and the pay could sometimes be a bit hit and miss but I did enjoy it most of the time and that's because of the people. Our group just made the whole experience. There was a sense of 'in it together' and we all got along so well. Well most of us! When I first arrived most of house had either just arrived or were just about to leave and be replaced with some new people so for the majority of the time I spent on the farm it was the same group.

The family!
Becci, Lloyd, Felix, Hiro, Nox, ME!, Simon
Yuki, Nick, Murray, Taka, Kenta
The first day I met Lucas and Jasper who were both from Sweden. Lucas had been there nearly 4 months and was very much looking forward to be leaving the following week with Jasper. Luigi (obviously Italian) was possibly the most negative person I've ever met. There I was about to embark on three months of work and all he could say was "its shit" and "you don't earn any money". Not the thing you want to here when you have been in the house a couple of hours! He left the same day as the sweeds and was actually sacked on his last day because he was so shit which is probably why he didn't earn any money. (far left in the first picture). Also leaving in my first week was a Japanese alcoholic who's parting gift was to piss all over the floor in one of the bedrooms when he was aiming out of the window! There was also a girl who I think was from Finland who started the same day as me but she quit after the first day saying it was too hard even though it was probably one of the easiest days. Of course there was also Axel (Swedish) who arrived the day before me and was a moron from the start. "Hi, I'm Axel" was his welcome before immediately walking off before I could respond. An hour later he returns ordering everyone to do there washing up despite him only being there for 24 hours. Not the best way to make friends.

Chilling after picking potatoes
Once those guys had left the family began to form. Hiroaki was now the longest resident. An absolute legend from Japan who barely spoke any English when I first met him but he would study every night for at least an hour to the point where you could almost have a full conversation with him. His catchphrase "exactuly!". Lloyd (English) had been there nearly 4 weeks and Murray (Scottish) had been there 2 weeks. Both I had some serious banter with. I say banter it was more them winding me up and I would bite every time!

Next doors horse
Then new people started arriving. Becci was a friend of Lloyds from when they was in Byron Bay and she got a job through him and they quickly became a couple despite Becci's constant denial that it would happen. Nick who I met on the plane flying to Australia was on his way to Bundaberg and randomly messaged me asking if there was anything going at our farm. Lets face it I barely knew the guy and had no idea if I would like working with him or not but I thought I'd be nice and ask anyway. He got a job and it turned out to be a good decision. Two Koreans, Hanei and Joe arrived on the same day but didn't know each other previously. Felix from Denmark who spoke extremely good English you could almost mistake him for being English if it wasn't for the accent. He was the one who finally succeeded where many had failed and got me watching Game of Thrones. Then there was Kenta (Japan) who had the best laugh, Taka (Japan), Yuki (Japan (girl)) and Simon (Cananda) who was there for most of the second half of my farming life.

Stocking up!
Other people came and went during the 3 months. Another Scottish guy was there for a week before going off to meet his girlfriend. There was a Canadian who proclaimed that work would be easy and wouldnt be told otherwise despite the whole house telling him its not easy. He started the next day and quit before lunch and had a full on argument with Andrea claiming he'd been lied to. There was also Ben from Taiwan who gave Axel a run for his money as the worst worker. Axel was just slow but Ben kept doing it wrong as well. There was also Enyon from Korea who I felt really sorry for. He really tried hard but was just physically incapable of doing the work. I'm sure there were others but they can't have made much impact on me.

Joe's Birthday
So with the house more or less full with up to 14 people you were never short on someone to talk to. I spent most of my time in the lounge watching TV with everyone and a few of us got really into My Kitchen Rules and then Biggest Loser. Evening entertainment was sometimes limited! Tuesday nights it was semi-tradional to go to the pub for food until one day someone had the awesome idea of going to pizza hut for the 2 for $10 deal. We would get 2 each, one for the night and one for next days lunch! Any other circumstance you would get fat eating 2 pizzas a week but I actually lost 1.5 stone!

BARBEQUE!!!!!
Saturday I would yell out "BAAAARBEEEEEQUUUUUUUUE" in an Italian accent (Luigi's only legacy) as every week would we would all congregate at the table outside and have ourselves a BBQ feast. I cooked for 11 out the 13 weeks (I didn't cook the first week and we didn't have any gas on another). I enjoyed cooking the BBQ, it is my thing afterall. But it meant I could put my music on and I didn't have to clean up.


Following that we would always play drinking games and get horrendous drunk. Work hard, play hard! The only time I was glad Axel was there was on one of these occasions when he started looking at the cards through one eye after drinking 2 bottles of wine. It was hilarious entertainment until he sprayed the bathroom in puke. Kenta was also particularly good and downing the king cup (usually a mixture of 4 different peoples drinks.) There was one time where he was halfway through downing the drink, threw up everywhere and then finished it. LAD!

Mexican Night! (when there was no gas)
Party
Twice we treated ourselves to a night out in Bundaberg city. The options were limited but we had a good night both times. Expecially the second time when Hiro was really drunk and kept bumbling up to random girls and trying to talk to them whist basically falling on them. Was really funny to watch though!

Anyone for a jager train
Compulsory asian photo pose
Sunday was mainly a rest day or more likely the hangover day. Time to do washing, go shopping and chill out before another hard week. We sometimes went down to the pool down by the river until it shut at the end of April. They had a sort of massive inflatable obstacle course thing which believe me is a lot harder than it looks. It must have taken me over an hour to do it the first time around. I soon found that the key is not to put sun cream on!

Pool o'clock
The cycle continued for many weeks, working hard during the week, drinking a lot on the weekend and not a lot else happened. Nick fractured his ankle about a week before he left. He was only supposed to be going home for a few weeks and coming back but his ankle meant he didn't come back which was a shame.

There was another eclipse! I knew all about the total eclipse that happened in November but there was another one. Not a full one but an Annular one which is when the moon is too far away from the earth to completely cover the sun and a ring is formed. On the day I actually forgot this was going to happen and kept looking around the sky thinking there was a big black cloud looming as it seemed darker than usual and then someone reminded me and I looked at the sun. Not advisable but it was a bit hazy and it looked like a very point crescent moon. We were too far south to see it properly and it was obviously not as good as a total eclipse but impressive none the less.

Working hard
One of the highlights of the entire 3 months was when the shopping centre reopened. It had been shut since the floods in January and reopened a few weeks before I left. Its not much but there was genuine excitement in the house! Coles finally!

Hiro and Murray on there last day with Jules
People then began to leave and fun began to dwindle. First Nick and Joe and then Taka. The day that Hiro, Felix and Murray left the house was a particularly sad day. Hiro and Murray were the biggest characters in the house and I got on really well with Felix so once they left the house just seemed rubbish. It didn't help that there replaced were some absolute morons. Another Simon who acted like a giddy immature teenager and an Italian who was just like all the other Italians I've met before - don't give a shit and moan all day long. At least I only had a couple of weeks with them.

A good rainbow
At least I managed to escape the house on 1 night in the last couple of weeks as Ben and Mel, from my first week with UltimateOz and again in Adelaide, came to Bundaberg to do their farmwork. We went for a steak and had a catch up and said goodbye all at the same time as I was leaving on the following Sunday.

Finished!
Its a shame that I didn't particularly enjoy my last 2 weeks on the farm but it did not overshadow the whole experience which despite it being seriously hard work it was generally enjoyable and I made some good friends there. Two of which I would meet again in Cairns which was my next point of call. The last week I was practically jumping about the place thinking 'that's the last time I'm doing that!'. The last BBQ I got particularly wasted whilst passing on the tongs to whoever the next chef would be and on Sunday I got on the train and headed north for warmer weather and good times.

Friday, 5 July 2013

Melbourne Grand Prix

14th - 17th March 2013

Something that was very high up on my list of priorities whilst here in Australia was to go to the Melbourne Grand Prix, so I did. Easily the coldest and wettest experience I've had in Australia but definitely one of the best.

I was surprised at how accessible everything was. I only had a General Admission ticket which would allow me into most areas but I was surprised to find that I could actually get pretty much anywhere. There was a bar right next to the main straight that I thought you would surely have to be VIP to enter but no, i walked right in. I even managed to sneak into nearly all of the grandstands around the circuit over the course of the weekend (not on race day, obviously). You can't visit the pit areas of the F1 teams but you can for all of the support races including V8 races, porsche, celebrity and historic races.

Porsche garages
There were a few races in each support category over the weekend but the biggest of these was the V8 races which is a much bigger deal than I realised, especially here in Australia, they go mental for it. For most of the support races I just wanted to see people crash as I didn't really have much interest in them but I found myself getting really into the V8 races.

Back of the V8 garages
V8 racing
There was so much other stuff going on besides what was on the track. I found myself constantly looking at the schedule to make sure I could see everything that I wanted to see. There was a live action area which had repeat performances on all weekend. One of the acts was this guy that flew around on this big pendulum type thing doing tricks. There was a massive inflatable thing that you could launch yourself onto from a 10 metre board if you had the nerve. The biggest of these performances was the Nitro Circus where they do all kinds of tricks on anything with two wheels. There main show was to be the headline act on Sunday after the race but the weather meant they had to tone it down a little.

Nitro Circus
One of the highlights of the whole race weekend came on the Thursday at the autograph stage where all the F1 drivers showed there faces. I have no use for a piece of paper with a famous persons name on it so I just camped out in front of the stage rather than in a very long queue. I couldn't believe how close I got to all the drivers. I've seen them so many times over the years on TV and here they were less than 5 metres away. I saw all the big names: Vettel, Webber, Alonso, Button, Hamilton. It was a shame Schumacher retired because that would have been amazing. Vettel got a suitable booing from the Aussie crowd but I'm sure that's nothing to the treatment he'll get next year after what he did to Webber in Malaysia the following week.
Aussie Ledge!
British Ledge!
Pair of....ledges
The following day at the Autograph stage the celebs from the Celebrity Mazda races had their turn. There was only a couple of names I recognized. One of them was Chris Tarrant and I'm not particularly bothered about seeing him but the other was Sir Chris Hoy, a true legend in sport and I had to go and see him!

An actual Sir
As if there wasn't already enough going on I look upwards and see there's all kinds of crazy stuff going on in the sky as well! The Australian equivalent of the Red Arrows were on everyday of the weekend, a jet fighter made everyone wet themselves every now and again by flying over the track and a few minutes before the race a huge jumbo jet made a pass.

I can see you
Where's the airport?!
Ahhh the weather. Thursday: Gorgeous, got sun burnt. Friday: A bit cloudy, still got burnt. Saturday: pneumonia! It was bloody freezing! I was watching Free Practice 3 when the meanest looking cloud rolled in from behind the stand and soaked everyone underneath it.

I think it might rain
I had a jacket on but it wasn't enough for the deluge that came. It was only 15C which is bloody freezing when you've spent over 6 months in +30C. I tried to take some videos of the first part of Qualifying but my hands were shaking so much that they are barely watchable. Q2 got postponed for 10 minutes to let the rain pass and the track to dry out. It did neither of those things and the marshals started sweeping the standing water. Another 10 minutes and then another 20 before they called it quits and decided to run Qualifying in the morning before the race.

A tad wet
Where I hid waiting for Qualifying to resume
I came prepared for race day which was the day with the worst weather forecast. I heard an Aussie say behind me that there has never been a wet race in Australia before but I put on my bin liner full of confidence that I was as prepared as I could be for the onslaught. It was dry all day! Still it protected me against the wind which was bitter.

Prepared!
I got there early and picked the best spot I could find which I had scoped out over the past few days and sat there for 8 hours waiting for the race to start. Sounds bad but there was still lots going on. There was the rest of the postponed qualifying and a few more support races.

One thing that was particular interesting was the Speed Comparison Test where an F1 car was pitted against a V8 race car and a normal road sports car. They set off about a minute apart and all crossed the line at the same time.

Speed Comparison Test

The excitement built throughout the day especially when this Italian lot got out the banner and their beers. A few more jet passes and the drivers parade and it was time to race!

Well said!
Drivers parade
I bought I portable radio so I could try and stay in touch with what was happening in the race. There was the big screen right in front of us but you don't always get the full story so I turned it up as loud as it would go and jammed in ear phones hard into my ears and tried my best to listen. It was difficult to say the least but if I kept hold of the ear phones I could just about make out what they were saying.

Racing
I think it was an exciting race but having never been to a race before it was hard to tell if it really was or not. Raikkonen won the race with Alonso 2nd and Vettel in 3rd.

Before the race they had shown a notice saying do not enter the track until the safety car had been past showing a green light. So I positioned myself as close to a gap in the fence as I could get and jumped over as soon as the car went past. I must have been the 5th person onto the track but that finishing straight is longer that it looks on TV! It nearly killed me running down to the podium! I swear I was having a heart attack whilst they were lifting their trophies.

Winner!
Martin Brundle = Ledge!
Sky team
Ted talking to Christian Horner
Best day ever
The pits
As night began to fall and the mass dismantle of everything began the security seemed to become a bit lax. All the places you not allowed to go before suddenly I could walk right in without anyone stopping me. It became a game of how far can I go into F1s inner circle before someone stopped me. In the VIP section there was a small stand of seats where people were waiting to get autographs of people. I walked right in front of that and decided to hang around where all the famous people were getting into the cars. There were a few old race drives including Niki Lauda. I thought I might hand around for someone like Bernie but I was exhausted so I went home.

Pretending I'm a VIP
What a weekend! I'm so glad that I've finally been to a Formula 1 Grand Prix and I think that it was even more special because it was in Melbourne. I really hope to go again and even see another one somewhere else. I plan to go to Kuala Lumper next year where the tickets a dirt cheap and I mean ridiculously cheap. (£15 for a weekend ticket!)

I took a lot of videos this weekend so I decided to make a video montage. Its awesome!